so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize