do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
