Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
