Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
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