I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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