loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
