never play flip cup with pint glasses
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
