my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
