i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
