remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize