I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
