I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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