so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
