i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
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