matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize
