Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
