Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
