it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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