With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
