I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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