I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I have feelings that need drinking.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
