Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
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