we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
