I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Randomize