Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
