I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Randomize
