Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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