well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
