We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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