Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Randomize
