If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
