Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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