oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
