as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
