i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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