I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Is it because I queefed?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
