i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
