I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
