Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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