Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Randomize
