ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
