Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
