When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
