if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
