Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Randomize