I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
