nut hugger
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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