Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
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