I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
