evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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